"Not eating chard. That's what all those weirdos eat at their stupid picnics on the Hungry Ghost lawn." -Nina

July 23, 2008

Real talk, Nominate R.Kelly as Northampton Ma's Poet Laureat in 2009.

From the NRKANMPL group organized for this effort,

"The Arts Council of Northampton nominates a Poet Laureate for the City of Northampton every year. The NRKANMPL group would like to extend the invite to R.Kelly for 2009. Fo real. Have you heard Real Talk? Clearly he is not only America's poet, but should also be Northamptons. Celebrate Diversity.
Contact info for the Arts Council, whom you should advocate to directly, can be found here. Fwiw, I used to sit on the board there, and they are all a very nice bunch who I feel would def be open to considering Kells as N'ton's Poet Laureate. Need some convincing on the nomination? Here are a couple of passages from R.Kelly's greatest poem, Real Talk. You can listen to the audio recitation of Real Talk in full, here:
"....how the fuck she knew I was with them other girls then when the whole club packed? wait a minute let me finish what I've got to say. i've been with you five years and you listening to your motherfucking girlfriends. I dont know why you fuck with them, all jealous no man havin ass hoes anyway. real talk.

dont you think i got enough bullshit on my mind. real talk, hold hold up didnt I just give you money to go get yours hair, toes and nails done the other day, hmm, yeah your ass was smiling then...

fuck me? girl fuck you!

you gonna burn what? bitch I wish you would burn my motherfucking clothes with your triflin ass, milton, you bogus girl, milton start your car up and get ready to take me home, this bitch done lost her motherfucking mind."
UPDATE: The NRKANMPL group has received it's first letter of support, reprinted below.

"It recently came to my attention that R. Kelly is being considered as the poet laureate for Northampton. I think this is an inspired choice and I congratulate you on your creativity and forward thinking.

If anyone charged with making this decision is less familiar with Mr. Kelly’s work I encourage them to listen to, or better yet watch “Trapped in the Closet” on YouTube. It’s incredibly original and holds its own with any modern opera.

It’s a shame that R. Kelly’s legal troubles have overshadowed his creative accomplishments, especially since he was cleared of all charges. His work is consistently brilliant and his love songs/poems are some of the most compelling in any medium today.

All the best,

Rob Anderson
(formerly of South Street, Crescent Street, and Barrett Place)"

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