"Not eating chard. That's what all those weirdos eat at their stupid picnics on the Hungry Ghost lawn." -Nina

March 12, 2008

Vatican Shows That At The Very Least, 54% Of Northampton Residents Will Spend Eternity In Hell

"After 1,500 years the Vatican has brought the seven deadly sins up to date by adding seven new ones for the age of globalisation...'You offend God not only by stealing, blaspheming or coveting your neighbour’s wife, but also by ruining the environment, carrying out morally debatable scientific experiments, or allowing genetic manipulations which alter DNA or compromise embryos,'" Bishop Gianfranco Girotti said. [link]

According to numbers given the Mayor Higgins, approximately 46% of all residents and business in Northampton recycle, which would seem to suggest that the other 54% will spend eternity in Hell for ruining the environment. Which says nothing of other mortal sins named by Bishop Gianfranco Girotti which include "...taking or dealing in drugs, and social injustice which caused poverty or 'the excessive accumulation of wealth by a few'." committed by residents of town.

This newly updated list of sins is needed to address what Bishop Girotti said "'...have appeared on the horizon of humanity as a corollary of the unstoppable process of globalisation'. Whereas sin in the past was thought of as being an individual matter, it now had 'social resonance'."

I am grateful to know that my advocacy for recycling bins on Main St., my concern demonstrated for those who donated to Pleasant St. Theater concerned only with their own enjoyment, as well video done with heroin addicts, those who have no homes, and church pastors, will go a long way towards opening the pearly gates for me, to say nothing of my poverty, my refusal to eat meat or fish, and that time I inquired about getting a job with the Pedal People.

LABELS: recycling, national news